Alright, I’m a little behind on the sporting news. But I’ve been so distracted by the madness, the chaos, the utter fiasco that this year’s Greatest Tournament in Professional Sports has been. Well maybe fiasco is a little dramatic. But it’s not far off. Let’s take a quick gander at what has transpired thus far: tourney favorites such as France, England, Spain and Germany have completely under-performed. The latter two will almost certainly make it to the next round anyway, but a win and a loss for two of the overall favorites is a bit of a shock. And France and England have all but completely imploded, all the while Beckham and Zidane watch helplessly from the sidelines.
Second, the disaster box that is World Cup officiating is being completely ignored by the superbly and ethically administrated FIFA organization. What, is the sarcasm too thick? Ok, ok. Most of the matches so far have had little to no referee controversy, and that should be noted. But the ones that have been mired in it are, as Alexi Lalas put it, a disgrace. From Brazil’s Kaka being ejected for his uncanny ability to break a player’s face by gently nudging his sternum, to Findley’s yellow card for hitting the ball with his head, to the crown jewel of referee scandal, the elusive Edu “it’s illegal to score the winning goal while your teammates are being assaulted in the box” foul. Let’s take another look, shall we?
Now this is not to say there haven’t been great moments. Despite the controversy, the USA rally to win, er, equalize after a 2-0 halftime deficit was exciting. And there have been beautiful goals, like Christiano Ronaldo’s neck stall from yesterday, which I could show you if FIFA wasn’t rampaging against copyrighted content on YouTube. Thanks again, FIFA. Well, now I have a deal for you. As long as the United States are still in the running, place an order for a MacBook, MacBook Pro, or MacBook Air repair and email in the coupon code “USA” to firstname.lastname@example.org for $10 off the service. As always, this is good for repairs only, not diagnosis. The more you support your nation’s squad, the longer they stay in, so the longer this deal goes. So root for the red, white and blue tomorrow against Algeria and we’ll hook you up on your next repair. USA! USA!.